Do It Yourself

Posted 10 Apr, 2010

If you're reading this, then it's a fair assumption to say that at least one of the following statements applies:

You're keen on puzzles and/or competitions

You like language

You have too much time on your hands.

So, I have a suggestion – rather than solve puzzles, why not have a go at making one up? Break yourself in gently with something without a grid or a theme. The classic surrealist alphabet should get your mind working in a lateral rather than a literal way. Here's the standard one:

A for 'orses (hay for horses)

B for mutton (beef or mutton)

C for th' highlanders (Seaforth Highlanders)

D for 'ential (deferential)

E for Adam (Eve or Adam)

F for 'vescence (effervescence)

G for police (chief of police)

H for respect (age for respect)

I for Novello (Ivor Novello)

J for oranges (Jaffa oranges)

K for 'ancis (Kay Francis)

L for leather (Hell for leather)

M for 'sis (emphasis)

N for 'adig (in for a dig, or infradig)

O for the garden wall (over the garden wall)

P for a penny (pee for a penny)

Q for a song (cue for a song), or Q for billiards (cue for billiards)

R for mo (half a mo)

S for you (it's for you)

T for two (tea for two)

U for me (you for me)

V for la France (Vive la France)

W for a bob (double you for a bob)

X for breakfast (eggs for breakfast)

Y for Gawd's sake (why, for God's sake)

Z for breezes (zephyr breezes)

Once you've done that, take on the challenge of compiling a crossword. Your first step is to make the grid. Generally, there's an odd number of rows, and the same number of columns; there should be a symmetry to the grid; and there shouldn't be separate blocks – it should be possible to trace a path through all of the words without taking your pen off the paper.

Your second step is to fill the grid with words. This can be a challenge, so start off with a 5×5 grid, then work your way through 7×7, 9×9, 11×11 and 13×13 grids. Then – and only then – should you worry about the clues.

If you fancy a real challenge, have a go at cryptic clues. There are many types of cryptic clue (which must contain a definition of the answer word), but some are easier than others. A few of the simpler ones are:

Anagrams
Managed grandiose arrangement (9) = ORGANISED

'Managed' is the definition of the solution (ORGANISED), while 'grandiose arrangement' means 'make an anagram of grandiose'.

Double Definitions
Maintains towers (5) = KEEPS

Both words in the clue are synonyms of the solution.

Homophones
Passed time making unrestrained announcements on the radio (6) = WHILED

'Passed time' is the definition of the solution (WHILED); 'unrestrained' is the homophone (word with the same sound as the solution, but not necessarily the same spelling); and 'announcements on the radio' is the introducer meaning 'when spoken'.

Initials
Start wailing and shouting, panicking stinger (4) = WASP

'Stinger' is the definition. 'Start' is the introducer meaning 'the first letters of' 'wailing', 'and', 'shouting' and 'panicking': WASP.

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